5 Tips For Coping With Overwhelming Emotions
Events and interactions with others or with ourselves may precipitate negative or overwhelming emotions. Feeling stressed, down, anxious, hopeless, or overwhelmed are some of the leading emotions to trigger a relapse. It is important to have skills to help cope and manage overwhelming emotional responses. 1. Observe and describe the emotions. Emotions have physical, cognitive, and behavioral aspects to them. It is important to observe these aspects and describe them to better understand the cycle of emotions. If we can identify and explain how we feel tense and warm when we are angry, or if we feel clammy, shaky, and loss of breath when we are anxious, we will be better equipped to implement skills and prevent unhealthy behavioral responses to uncomfortable emotions. 2. Reframe negative or overwhelming thoughts. Thoughts play an important role in coping with overwhelming emotions. After a prompting event, we have individual interpretations to these events. Emotions are self-perpetuated and implementing alternative thoughts when we are overwhelmed can help to break the cycle from feeling frustrated, to angry, to hopeless. If we do not get a job that we are hoping for, it can be easy to cycle down into self-defeating thought patterns that retrigger hopelessness and feeling disheartened. Instead, reframe to other opportunities and experiences gained from the interview process and what you can do differently. Alternative perspectives can also help to ease the negative emotional response. 3. Become aware of your vulnerability to negative emotions. The common expression is HALT. Are you hungry? Are you angry? Are you lonely? Are you tired? This is important to keep in mind to ease feeling stressed and decrease the chance you will act impulsively. Another vulnerability is if we are under the influence of drugs or alcohol. If we are aware of our vulnerabilities then we can be at ease knowing it feels worse in this moment than it would if we had felt well rested, were sober, or if we had eaten a fulfilling meal. It is important to make note of our vulnerabilities and engage in self-care to prevent further emotional suffering. 4. Distract. Distraction can be extremely useful in tolerating the feelings in the moment so we do not act on them in a way that may cause harm to us later. A helpful acronym is ACCEPTS. Are there activities you can try? This could be visiting with a friend, attending a meeting, or treating yourself to a nice dinner. You can contribute to someone through service work and giving back. Compare your state with another’s perspective and increase gratefulness for your situation. You can try acting opposite to the emotion you’re feeling. If you are feeling sad or low, listen to an upbeat or empowering song. You can also try pushing the negative emotions or thoughts away. This should be a last resort to tolerating negative emotions. You can try changing your thoughts (see tip number 2 for more information). Lastly, self-soothing through bubble bath, getting a massage, or your favorite candle. Are You Trying to Quit Using Drugs or Alcohol? We offer an array of addiction treatment services & therapies
Core Beliefs: How They Influence You and What to Do About It
Core beliefs influence everything you do. Shaped by your childhood experiences, they’re deeply ingrained beliefs about yourself, others, and the world around you. Sometimes core beliefs can lead to cognitive distortions, meaning you get an inaccurate view of reality. Do Your Positive or Negative Core Beliefs Affect How You See Yourself? As you go through life experiencing the world, you unconsciously interpret, judge, feel, and figure out what things mean. It’s how you learn to survive. If, as a child, you had a family that encouraged curiosity and safe risk-taking and gave you support and validation, your inner monologue is likely supportive. If you have a positive core belief system, you only recall life data that supports existing, fact-based experiences with positive views of yourself and the world. If you grew up in a family that gave you little support, your inner monologue will be negative, reflecting your rules about yourself and the world. Some of the rules people create through core belief systems become a major source of anxiety and depression. Negative core beliefs about yourself typically fall into one of three categories: Some examples of negative core beliefs include: Have you ever heard yourself say something like the statements above, or thought them in your head? You may have negative core beliefs, at least when it comes to yourself. It is common to only pay attention to evidence that supports your core beliefs and toss aside evidence that doesn’t. This concept is called “confirmation bias.” And it’s why changing your core beliefs can be a difficult task. These distorted ways of thinking are your default setting. You must retrain yourself to think differently, which takes time and a lot of work. Core Beliefs Play a Role in Addiction Dysfunctional core beliefs about yourself can fuel unhealthy relationships and behaviors, such as drug and alcohol abuse. An example of a common core belief that addicted people have is, “I am bad.” This is a heavy burden to carry. When you attribute every difficulty that happens to you as something you brought on yourself, it can lead to depression, feelings of helplessness, low self-esteem, and self-hate. People sometimes turn to substance abuse, eating disorders, and other unhealthy coping practices to quiet negative self-talk and numb their feelings. Addiction can further fuel the negative core beliefs that “I am bad” or, “I am unworthy.” Society at large doesn’t accept that addiction is a disease, and there’s still great stigma around it. Having that message mirrored back to you and feeling like you can’t stop abusing drugs or alcohol on your own can just keep your negative core beliefs going. You Can Identify and Challenge Core Beliefs It’s not easy, but it’s very possible to change your core beliefs. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is a research-backed approach proven effective in treating substance use disorders, mental health disorders, and trauma. Medication and other therapies can complement the work done in CBT. Cognitive behavioral therapy helps you challenge core beliefs that are negative and replace them with positive core beliefs. If CBT is part of your therapy for substance abuse, you might: 1. Identify situations, relationships, or conditions that are causing distress. For example, maybe you’ve just gotten out of an unhealthy relationship and you’re abusing alcohol. 2. Identify thoughts, beliefs, emotions, and behaviors tied to the distress. Your therapist will encourage you to talk about the situation and pay attention to the negative self-talk, physical sensations, and beliefs about yourself and other people in the situation. For example, when you talk about your ex-partner, your jaw and stomach might tighten. You may feel helpless. Your thoughts may be that you are bad and unworthy of love, so you don’t deserve any better. You may think you’ll never have a (fulfilling) relationship again. This could be one reason you self-medicate with alcohol. 3. Challenge distorted beliefs. Your therapist will help you challenge the accuracy of your thoughts. You will explore the actual evidence behind your beliefs. For example, you’ll discuss what tells you that you’re bad or unworthy. You’ll talk about what evidence supports your decision that you’ll never have a respectful relationship, and you don’t deserve one. A handful of examples of cognitive distortions include: 4. Work on alternative ways of thinking. Your therapist will help you replace negative or inaccurate thoughts and beliefs with positive, fact-based ones. You will learn that your perception is often distorted because of your negative core beliefs. In addition to addressing this in therapy, you may be asked to: You’ll work hard to recognize when your thoughts turn to negative core beliefs; challenge them; and replace them with more accurate, empowering thoughts. Cognitive behavioral therapy often creates positive change faster than other approaches. Many clients see significant improvement in 12 to 20 weeks of 30- or 60-minute sessions. Recently, a new form of CBT has emerged: intensive cognitive behavioral therapy (I-CBT). This approach involves longer, concentrated sessions over a weekend, week, month, or even a day-long session. There’s little research on I-CBT’s effectiveness. Get Help to Understand and Combat Your Negative Core Beliefs Negative core beliefs are hard to change, but, with work and dedication, you can transform your thinking, beliefs, and behaviors to be more healthy, accurate, and empowering. Distorted core beliefs are one of the underlying issues behind drug and alcohol abuse. Footprints to Recovery offers cognitive behavioral therapy as well as an array of other therapies proven to help people struggling with addiction and co-occurring mental health issues. Call us today to begin a better, more fulfilling life. References
Tips for a Successful Recovery – A Firsthand Experience
Relapse is not a fun topic to bring up during treatment for drugs and alcohol; however, it is crucial to individuals success. Research has found that relapse in the early days after treatment accounts for the largest percentage of overdose deaths yearly. In order to keep the risk of relapse and overdose low individuals leaving treatment are encouraged to learn and implement relapse prevention strategies. On behalf of International Overdose Awareness Day, August 31st 2017 – Nick Kratzer discusses his own battle with addiction and the strategies that he uses to continue to lead a life of recovery below. I was addicted to drugs for the better part of 10 years and have been to hell and back. I\’ve ruined relationships, dragged my family through the mud, lost jobs, attempted suicide, been spiritually bankrupt, and even broke my own bones to get that next fix. I am a recovering addict and have been clean since February 6, 2015! Self-acceptance is the key to me staying clean and I’ve been successful thus far in early recovery because I’ve built a life that I’m not willing to give up, simple as that. However, there are so many factors and elements to my day-to-day life that contribute to my on going success in recovery. Healthy Routes: Making my bed (sounds silly but helps set the tone of the day with accomplishing something first thing in the morning), exercise, prayer/meditation, and eating healthy. Talking to a Sponsor/Positive Support System: This is as simple as a few minute phone call to keep my sponsor/support network updated with my life on a daily basis. Staying Connected with Fellow Addicts: Isolation is terrible for addicts so I make it a point to talk to or see someone in recovery daily. Positivity and Challenging One’s Own Thoughts: Being positive and changing the way I think about things so that the things I think about could begin to change. Realizing I’m not a victim! Trying to see the good in every situation and knowing that there is a solution to every problem. Opening Up to Others: Allowing people in my life to know how I’m really feeling (so I can get the help I need) Continuously Learning About Oneself: Step work is the key to continued growth because it challenges me to really think about who I am and how I operate. Communication: This is a two-way street and it’s as simple as calling or texting someone in recovery on a regular basis. The longer I stay clean the more I realize that drugs were not the problem – I was the problem and I still can be if I don’t apply the tools that I’ve learned and implemented them in my life. In order for me to continue to grow, I must first stay clean and accept life on life’s terms. It’s not always rainbows and sparkles but what I’ve realized is nothing is permanent. Feelings change, bad things happen, expectations don’t get met and I have no control over those things. However, I do have control over the way I respond to these things (people, situations, etc..).
8 Modern Ways to Be More Spiritual
Feeling stressed? Looking for something to bring peace into your life? In this crazy hectic world, it’s no surprise we’re all looking for something to ground us. Spirituality is a broad concept that may mean something different for everyone. For some it involves looking for something bigger than themselves, finding meaning in one’s life and for others, it could simply be about finding calmness. However you personalize it, it is up to you … but there is no doubt that in today’s often frenzied society we could all possibly benefit from getting more in touch with ourselves, others and the world around us. Below is a list of ways to do just that, with out packing up for a 14-day trip to Tibet – although we do admit that sounds nice! 1. Pay Attention to Your Dreams An easy way to tap into your unconscious mind is to tune into your dreams. Try keeping a dream journal next to your bed and writing them down in the morning. 2. Make a Habit of Actually Telling People Why You Like Them and How They Make Your Life Better Simply put, human relationships are special. Each day we have interactions with others that we often take for granted. Make a habit of acknowledging those around you. If you appreciate someone let them know. 3. Take a Cleansing Natural Sea Bath It has long been said that the ocean has soothing powers; however, since we can’t all go hop in – relaxing baths may be an alternative. Cleansing baths are a wonderful way to get rid of stress and unwind. If you don’t have sea salt on hand, try a substitute like Epsom salt which is known for soothing aches and pains. Throw a few drops of your favorite essential oil in for a real treat! 4. Start Every Day By Thinking of 3 Things for Which You’re Grateful Studies have been shown that a five-minute a daily gratitude journal can increase your long term well being by more than 10%. If you can’t get into the habit of writing them down, simply go over them in your head before you get out of bed for the day. 5. Take Your Journaling to Spend Some One-On-One Time with Yourself and Your Thoughts Self-reflection, self-discovery, social awareness, and better communication skills are all proven benefits of journaling. If you’re having a difficult time coming up with things to journal, Journal Prompts are a sure way to get your mind going. 6. Connect to the World Through Nature Our lives are busy and our minds are even busier. Although we may spend time in nature, our inner chatter can often distract us. The next time you are outside, make an effort to clear the clutter in your mind. Listen to the wind, look at the trees or feel the sand in your toes. 7. Try a Visualization Exercise When You Need Guidance Often times used to help with anxiety, visualization exercises are useful whenever you feel as though you need to clear out your inner space and take a few breaths. You can find several variations of Visualization Exercises here . 8. Go Stargazing Simple, relaxing and incredibly calming. Search for constellations. Question the universe.
Tips for Staying Sober on the Fourth!
Independence Day, also referred to as The Fourth of July or July Fourth – An American Holiday primarily celebrated with barbecues, fireworks, flags, and … alcohol. It’s a fun and patriotic holiday, a time to gather with family and friends; however, for those in recovery, it is yet another holiday that challenges their sobriety. No matter where you are in your sobriety, these tips may help you stay sober on the fourth! 1. Celebrate your Freedom from Substance Abuse – Addiction threatens freedom in one of the most basic senses, freedom to pursue health and independent living. While America celebrates its freedom, use this holiday as a reminder of yours. Remember your freedom, sobriety, and the fight you fought to get here. 2. Pick your Parties – Don’t let the fear of missing out (FOMO) lead you somewhere that you do not feel safe and supported. You don’t have to attend every party you’re invited to. Surround yourself with friends and family members who are supportive of your sobriety and recovery. 3. Have an Exit Plan – Set guidelines for yourself, identify what are high-risk situations ahead of time. Be prepared to exit if you need. Drive your own car or attend events with someone who is willing to leave if needed. 4. Utilize your Support System – Attend events with other people in recovery, whether it be a sober event or just bringing a friend along to a party. Call your sponsor or other support systems beforehand, a few words of wisdom can go a long way. If you attend meetings, perhaps plan on going to a few more days leading to, day of, or after the holiday. 5. Practice Saying No – This may sound a bit corny, but – just say no. You’re not obligated to explain your situation to anyone, all you have to do is say no. If an individual is persistent or you’re feeling triggered, it might be time for tip number 3. Remember, recovery happens one day at a time. Prepare & take it easy.
Change, It Can be a Struggle – Here’s How to Make it Happen.
We all say we have something we want to change in our lives… “become a better person” “lead a healthier life” “repair relationships” “limit the amount of times I hit the snooze button” But, it’s one thing to want change and another to actually change. Every year, I make a verbal commitment to do something different. I genuinely want the change. But… alas I fail. Why?!? Why do we struggle with change? Throughout our lives, starting in childhood, we learn behaviors and skills that we use to get our personal needs met. These behaviors become habitual and automatic responses. Once we begin to sense that the behavior or thought is no longer working for us; whether on our own or through the suggestions of others, we start thinking about change. For example, if we learned in childhood that sharing our feelings and thoughts can make others upset and/or created feelings of fear due to someone(s) response – we may have realized that hiding our true thoughts and feelings could allow us to avoid conflict, judgment, and potential rejection. More on How to Overcome Situations Despite the initial pleasant outcome that can come from avoiding these consequences, low self worth and feeling “less than” can ultimately result from not feeling that one’s own feelings, thoughts, and needs are important to others. It often only increases your own fear of what people would think if they knew what was really going on inside you. This fear keeps us using the same behavior of hiding our true selves for a very long time. As we begin to sense that our needs aren’t being met or potentially when others point out that behaviors are causing us problems, we decide that we need to do something different. Problems may include issues in our relationships, jobs, maybe even substance use. At this point, we realize that we want a change that will increase positive outcomes such as feeling understood, feeling trusted, healthy relationships and reduced financial and legal issues. But, change is hard… And, every time we try to change and fail to maintain the change, our self-worth can be affected. We may tell ourselves, things like I just can’t do anything right. After several failures to change the same behavior, we may lose hope that the change is even possible for us. Recognizing that these “failures” have a positive lesson to be learned and if utilized are one step closer to creating long lasting change. Are You Trying to Quit Using Drugs or Alcohol? We offer an array of addiction treatment services & therapies What’s the Key to Change? A key to change is having a good plan. Many times people skip the planning stage and go straight to trying to change. But, as the saying goes… if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Failing or relapsing to old behaviors is more likely to happen if you aren’t prepared for potential setbacks or triggers. A good plan takes into account how to cope with the potential negative consequences of the change, as well as how we will meet our needs that will no longer be met by the old behavior. Using the example above concerning hiding one’s true feelings and thoughts, not allowing someone to know your thoughts and feelings does in fact reduce the potential negative consequence for the person to judge you and can indeed decrease the anxiety that results from the fear of judgment. However, a good plan would account for how one will tolerate the potential anxiety in a positive way as well as how to manage hurt feelings if the person they share with does indeed judge them. Most, if not all, behaviors have some sort of either real or perceived positive consequences along with the negative consequences. If the current behavior wasn’t meeting at least some real or perceived need for us, we would have changed long before the moment we decide to change. For example, although drugs and alcohol have numerous negative consequences, many people continue to use substances as a coping skill to negative situations in the moment. Someone may abuse heroin to have a sense of relief from extreme anxiety. Although they may in fact reduce anxiety in the moment, the use of heroin can cause extreme negative consequences such as legal, financial, and relational issues that continue long past the use of heroin. There is a short term gain despite long term negative consequences. If there wasn’t a short term gain, people wouldn’t continue to use substances as a coping skill. How do I plan for change? Ready, Set, Go! Once a specific and individual plan has been formulated and the person takes the first steps, change begins to occur. The change requires consistent use and re-working of the plan as needed. For example, although someone who is hoping to change/ stop their use of substances may have a current plan that involves attending daily support group meetings after treatment, it is possible that their work, family, and other outside obligations may require the reduction of these meetings to three times per week. The plan would need to reflect this change. The individual would be wise to look at what need the support group attendance was meeting. Care and support to keep him/her feeling grounded for the rest of the day? Maybe he/she replaces the missed meetings by utilizing their breaks at work to call their sponsor and practice 5 minutes of deep breathing/meditation. Although relapses may occur, this does not mean the person should give up. ALL that it means is that the plan needs to be re-worked to include the new wisdom. Once the person seeking change is able to successfully avoid returning to the old behavior, the goal is to maintain the change. Just because someone has been successful at not returning to an old behavior, it does not mean that they do not have thoughts of returning to the old behavior. People in maintenance must remain mindful and
How Will I Spend my Summer Now That I am Newly Sober?
It’s the season we’ve all been waiting for, SUMMERTIME! With the welcoming of warm weather, longer days, and sunshine people often ask the question – How will I spend my summer now that I am sober? Here are some ways to make the most of the season. 1. A Day at the Beach Grab the sunscreen and let the fun begin! New Jersey, Chicago, or a tropical island, having the sun on your face and the sand between your toes is the epitome of a true summer day. Rent a boogie or surf board, build a sandcastle, or just kick back and enjoy soaking in some vitamin D. Unsure of where the nearest beach is? Click on the link below to find the closest beach no matter where in the world you are! Beaches Worldwide 2. Grillin and Chillin Nothing tastes better than food on the grill. Whether you are biting into a juicy flame grilled burger or watermelon and pineapple (yes, grilled fruit is amazing), gathering friends together for a barbecue is a great way to enjoy the summer. Don’t have a grill… no worries! Many parks, forest preserves, and picnic grounds all have grills you can use for free. Not sure what to make? See a few links below for some great summer grilling recipes. Grilled Pineapple The Perfect Cheeseburger The Best BBQ Chicken 3. Have a Thrilling Time Looking to add a little adrenaline rush to those hot summer days and nights? Head to your local amusement park and take a ride on a heart-pounding roller coaster. If the long lines and heat start to get to you, jump on a water ride and cool off while keeping the excitement going. Amusement park not in your summer budget? Local carnivals can be a great way to get your adrenaline rush on a smaller budget. Plus, you can enjoy corndogs, cotton candy, and funnel cakes but, make sure you eat those after the rides! Click on the link below to find amusement parks and carnivals in your area. Fairs & Festivals Ultimate Rollercoaster Guide 4. Get Soaked! If you are a thrill seeker but beating the heat is your top priority, head over to waterpark in your area. Twist, turn, spin and splash down a slide or, kick back on a tube and float down a lazy river. Check out some of the best water parks in the country: Waterparks USA 5. Work it Out A workout is a great way to reduce stress and stay in shape both physically and mentally. Instead of running on the treadmill like a hamster on a wheel, take your workout outside and boost those endorphins while getting a healthy dose of vitamin D. Plenty of park districts hold outdoor fitness classes and different athletic stores play host to running clubs in the area. Feel like flying solo? Check out the link below to get a great outdoor total body workout: Outdoor Workout 6. Be a Team Player Have a little competitive edge inside of you? Join an intramural summer sports league! Depending on where you live or your athletic ability, a few options are: Have a team or need to join one? The link below will help you get the ball in motion. Team Sports Near You 7. Get Green We can all go to our local grocery store or farmer\’s market to get our favorite fruits and veggies but, why not test out your green thumb and try to grow some of your own. If you feel hindered by not having a yard of your own, not to worry! See the link below for the best indoor fruit and veggies to grow: The Best Plants to Grow 8. A Cinematic Summer The box office will have lines down the block to catch the new summer blockbuster but, who wants to sit inside on a warm summer night? Catch an old classic love story or a scary slasher pic at a local park or beach! We found some great ones in a city near you – Seaside Beach Movies Chicago Movies in the Park 9. Give Back Having fun in the sun can be twice as fun if it involves doing a little volunteer work. Here are a few organizations that are always looking for a helping hand: Looking to make a difference in your community? Click the link below to find an opportunity near you: I Want to Give Back 10. See the Sites No wind, no snow, no ice to get in your way! Grab some friends, pack some food, and take a road trip to a place you’ve always wanted to see. This summer, gas prices are lower than they have been in the past so, this is the perfect opportunity. Looking for a car or some new travel pals? The links below will have you on your journey! Road-Trip Meetups Roadtrips USA LET’S ALL HAVE A GREAT SUMMER! You Might Be Interested In
